I feel about as crazy as Jenny...

Jenny from the L Word, that is.

Last night we watched the last episode of season 4 of the L Word and it was during this episode that the character Jenny, who I have been told I am the most similar to out of all the characters (because there is such a lack of lesbians in pop culture, we lezzies like to sit around and decide who is like what character), got a puppy. A Pomeranian. She dresses herself up, dresses the dog up and parades through a hotel muttering "Stop it!" under her breath to the dog. I love it! I love it! That is me and Olive every single day. Trust me. If you could only see how ridiculous this scene is. The puppy also pees on a conference table, and Jenny, in true Jenny way ("mercurial"), says "Ooops. Someone's not potty trained!" Conference table. Meeting. Love it.

Anyway...

This is day, oh 8, of Nat being off meds. This is an accidental thing. My Dr. is in Massachusetts while I am in NYC. We chat on the phone and she continues to treat/prescribe me because I don't have enough time to start up with a new psychiatrist and all that jazz. But I am forgetful. And so I try to get a refill on my prescription the day before I need it. And she's out of town for a week. Oops.

Luckily, Lexapro doesn't do too much in terms of withdrawal symptoms. It just leaves your body naturally, on its own accord. I know this so I know it is okay for me to have bad habits for my prescription refills.

And so that is why, my friends, my girlfriend and I had the most wretched morning-fight today. Morning fights are the worst because there is the additional pressure of getting out the door to work on time and for some reason the most frequent lately. Having a puppy is like having a new baby in terms of sleep. Well, maybe not as bad, but you get the idea on how it is draining. Waking up at 6 everyday is just something I am not used to yet. So, with the combo of being off my meds and lack of sleep, I become one irrational little lady.

I flipped out upon a sort of nagging which spiraled into the "I'm not appreciated" feeling, which then turned into "my girlfriend isn't doing enough" mentality and which brought along its good friend "therefore she must not care..." which is really just a bad place to go in the morning when you can't match a shirt to your new skirt and no one has had any coffee, but are trying to get out the door in time. While there is a very needy baby puppy running around. So it was just a bad, bad morning. But at least I look cute. My new skirt has gotten lots of compliments. A co-worker even asked if my girlfriend knew I was wearing this?! Uh, yeah. We live together. (She's not going anywhere no matter how hard I try to push her away...) Despite the fight, we actually left the house together in peace after we made up.

Hm, maybe its the fishnets that brought on such a response...

I checked the pharmacy. My medicine's ready for pickup. I think everyone in the house will be thankful.

The end of the episode shows Jenny waking up in a kayak, floating in the middle of the ocean. She left her dog at the party. I hope I don't end up like that.