pugs

I am so bored. I have done my work sending those commercial instructions, even working ahead. When I work ahead, though, it only means I will be bored later. I think that as of now I am done for the day unless I get any changes or phone calls.

Today I finished Pug Hill and I am sad that I don't get to read it anymore. It really made me smile a lot and I even laughed out loud on the subway and at my desk...both rare. It ended happily ever after--she meets a man who happens to like her back and own a black pug puppy. I want a pug puppy! My parents told me I had to live on my own for a year before I could get one and J said 8 months so I am going with that. I have to prove that I can take care of myself before I take on the responsibility of taking care of another being. Sometimes, taken care of myself is hard because I like to have lots of fancy cocktails and then hot dogs for breakfast. I have to wait until I have enough money to support myself before I can support another being. Plus, J pointed out that we don't want puppy pee all over our stuff right now. I even promised I wouldn't shop if I could get one for my birthday in 3 months!!!! So now every time I see pretty shoes, purses, etc. I think how that money can be used on my pug in December. Boo. December is so far away. J said that money could be used on food for us, but we clearly have different priorities.

I am having trouble with my job. I feel like I want to cry. People get really grumpy about things that I am not involved with, like certain gianormous coorperations locking their systems last night... I sometimes think how organized I am and sometimes I worry that I am not very good at this. Half the time I am on the phone with people, I am telling them incorrect info. Or I am completely stumped as to how to deal with them. Phone stuff will get easier as I get the hang of it, they say, but I hate that part. After I get off the phone, I usually find that what I told them isn't right. Oops. I am really good at keeping my papers and tasks organized, but I feel like things slip through the cracks. For example, a woman from a synd. network called asking for traffic instructions and I told her there were none to be sent for that program. After I got off the phone I found the instructions, of course, stapled to an addition of that program. I guess if she really doesn't have it, they will find me, but I am pretty sure it got sent since there is a special stapled email with the instructions. I just need to get that off my chest.
Sometimes I love the girl that sits accross from me, but sometimes she is too loud when I am on the phone so I can't even hear my phone call. Also, she is a smoker and well, let's face it, that is hard to have accross from you when you are a new ex-smoker. (That is what I am supposed to call myself, not a quitter.) I really want a cigarete NOW. I have been thinking about them all day. I went to the bank over lunch and I thought how easy it would be to just have one and how I might resort to that when my job actually gets stressful and I turn grumpy like my co-workers. It is a bad day for the cravings...time to take the Wellbutrin!