wrinkling my nose

I feel out of sorts. I am frusterated and overwhelmed by the smallest things. Although the gym obstacle is proving to be difficult and stressful, I am taking it worse than usual. Work today also feels worse than usual since I forgot my book that I have been reading to take up the time at my desk. (One can only surf the internet aimlessly for so long.) I was about to finish it which really irks me. Getting healthy is something I know I should do. I even was excited about the last, highly out of our budget gym. I enjoyed using the machines. I was in much better spirits and headache free when I tried this gym compared to the 1st "bare-bones" gym we tried. At that gym, I couldn't find the 3 machines I like to use because there are so many thrown into the middle in no organized way that I could figure out. Anyway, it has gotten to be such a wrinkle my nose subject that I don't see the point in trying any of them out at all. As soon as I was finally enjoying the gym, I have to face the fact that I might not even have enough money to join a gym at all, cheap or fancy. $50/month seems like too much and I don't think I can budget it. I also don't know if I'd make time for it and get $50/month out of it. This makes me cranky. I am very cranky. Why should exercising in an indoor environment cost me so much. Perhaps in the scheme of things, that isn't that much, but I have seriously been struggling with my spending. It seems like there haven't been that many superfluous purchases lately, but yet I am still dipping into the nest egg until I am paid in 2 days. I don't want to think about the gym possibilites or talk about them right now. Not at work. I would propose to discuss them at home, but even then I don't want to talk about it. I want to wait until after my birthday, but I don't know what good that will do. I just don't want to deal with it!

Maybe I am so bored that I am finding things to be cranky about to entertain myself and expend some energy...I still have a headache and am generally in a nose-wrinkling mood.